Please don't ever forget when you wake up each morning, just how dangerous ignorance is. And how damaging and hurtful our silence, or inaction, can be. -Erin Forquer

"The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people

but the silence over that by the good people."

-Dr. Martin Lurther King, Jr.

Someone wise once told me to wander often, get lost whenever I can, and never lose the wonder, or hope, of finding what I am looking for. Even if I don't know where my answers are, or if I'll even find them, I still believe I'll find what I'm supposed to- even if it isn't what I thought I wanted. -Erin Forquer

Learning to let go of the things that no longer belong to us- or with us, or perhaps never meant for us at all, may be one of the hardest tasks in life. And one of the most painful. But in the end, it may save our life, and give us the only opportunity to live the life that we are supposed to. Never forget this painful truth for yourself- or others, because it might just make us all a lot kinder as we walk this earth. -Erin Forquer

In the end, only three things matter:

How much you loved,

How gently you lived,

and how gracefully you let go 

of things not meant for you. 

-Buddha

I was asked to write some advice about raising a child for one of my best friends' baby shower. As I tried to start writing, I realized that the only advice I could give her- was to teach her child what love means in the same way that she and her family have taught me. So this is my wish for your family, and my family, and all of our families. Thank you for showing me what love and family means, in the best definition imaginable. Sincerely, Erin

Quote: Erin Forquer

My sincerest hope, for all of us, is that you are given the opportunity to find this place. It isn't an external place with an actual location. Perhaps, rather it's a hidden internal voice, when you're among people who love you without conditions, which quietly whispers to you "I dare you to be yourself." -Erin Forquer

If you can find beauty within your pain, then you will not live in vain. -Erin Forquer

Perhaps someday I'll crawl back home,

beaten,

defeated.

But not as long as I can make stories 

out of my heartbreak,

beauty out of my sorrow. 

-Sylvia Plath

Our idea about the meaning of life, our "life's mission," our brief time on this earth to make our mark.. whatever you want to call the reason that we are here, on this little planet thats circling a slowly dying star.... Just make sure that what you call it is your own. -Erin Forquer

If this is what love is, which I think it is, then I signed up ages ago... I'm just waiting for my callback. -Erin Forquer

Life goes on... Like a bad nightmare, that you can swear is real, and won't stop despite your cries for mercy. But. Life. Goes. On. And there is so much beauty you haven't found yet. -Erin Forquer

Whenever I am lonely, or questioning the state of the world.. I think of all the people I have crossed paths with that have changed me. The stranger in the hospital waiting room, who hugged me so fiercely- without any words, when she heard me call home to say that my friend wouldn't be making it through the night. The coach who believed in me when even I didn't. The family I found in New York, who took care of me without expectations. The clients who shared their story with me, with trust and courage I didn't even know existed.. And I'm comforted by the thought that I have something to live up to. I might not always hit the mark, but just the trying gives me hope. -Erin Forquer

The paths we take sometimes lead us away from people we know and love,

but in the end....

What matters is that we affect 

the lives of others for the better. 

Somehow..

Whoever we are,

Whatever our story.

But if you are able to let 

Yourself love honestly and 

Without fear,

Then maybe that 

Huge heart you have,

WILL SOMEHOW SET YOU

FREE. 

-BBC's 'The Body Farm'

Love is dangerous. It is also, unfortunately, as necessary as oxygen- despite the risk. And despite the pain. -Erin Forquer

There is far more in this world that, when it comes down to it, doesn't make any sense. Cruelty. Abuse. Inequality. Too many things to name here and now. Perhaps the only way we can make any sense of it is to change whatever it is we can change. Make your own world, even if the world hasn't earned entrance to it yet. It's the only way to make it a better place after you're gone. -Erin Forquer

Quote: Miranda July

Ironic isn't a strong enough word to illuminate the difference between the expected and actual outcome of my life. It's ironic that I've spent my entire life striving for my next accomplishment- a degree- the two letters after my name, then the third.. How silly I was to think that any of that mattered. It's ironic that the truth is- all that really matters is finding something to do with your life that matters to someone else. It took talking someone off a ledge to realize this, but, ironically, in the end I was the one who was saved -Erin Forquer

You might hate parts of your past.. you might think they make you weaker than others. But by the sheer act of surviving them, enduring through the painful, or even shameful parts.. that is what makes you infinitely stronger than those who have been privileged with an "easier" life. It's a blessing and a curse. But it is also, undoubtedly, all the evidence you will ever need of your own strength. -Erin Forquer

People have far more in common than they would ever guess. But we spend too much time judging other peoples' differences. We're all weird, and insecure, and lost, way deep down... But why does it seem like everyone is so damn afraid to go there? I'd like to think it's better than what true loneliness feels like. -Erin Forquer

Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else.  -David Foster Wallace

It's infinitely harder to judge someone once you've heard their story. I've spent most of my life striving to be great, or perfect, at something, instead of just trying to be good... to me, to you, to the world. -Erin Forquer

Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of understanding. - Bill Bullard

It becomes infinitely harder to judge someone, once you've heard their story. Their unfiltered, unedited, terrifyingly real story of everything they've seen, felt, experienced and endured. The story that everyone has, that explains why they are who they are. Be grateful every time someone is brave enough to tell you their story. -Erin Forquer

Loving someone is so vulnerable... It's exhausting, and terrifying, and sometimes it breaks you. I just hope, after all the heartache, that I can continue to put my faith in the right people. -Erin Forquer

I wish I could be your mirror.

Please, don't ever forget the power of your words. They have an infinite reach, and an endless lifespan. -Erin Forquer

Sometimes, the saddest thing about love, is the beauty that is destroyed in the process... -Erin Forquer

You might as well face your demons now. Because all that haunts you, even your dreams, will follow you. -Erin Forquer

I am so glad I have struggled. It reminds me of what I can endure, and what human beings are capable of surviving. -Erin Forquer

It's not always true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Sometimes, it just makes it grow wearier. -Erin Forquer

Quote Rick Riordan

We all need to retreat at times.. but don't hide for too long, the world needs your beauty. -Erin Forquer

If I could make you believe one thing- it would be this; the most important things you'll ever do are the hardest, and the most painful. But that is exactly why you have to do them. We grow in love, but we grow in pain, too. -Erin Forquer

Life is confusing. Sometimes, it isn't enough to try to be great, or perfect.... but rather just simply try to be good. -Erin Forquer

I wish I was brave enough to wear my heart on my sleeve. To let the world see all my scars, my hopes, my dreams, my fears and what haunts me. I'm a work in progress, and I'm working on it. -Erin Forquer

Love never turns out the way you think it will. And loss, or heartache, leaves two people in a place they could have never anticipated... Strangers in a strange, but familiar land.. trying to make sense of the surrounding fading memories that no longer add up.. And trying to understand that- well, that is the anguish of love lost. -Erin Forquer

Maybe you broke my heart. Maybe my blindness let me break my own. Maybe I broke yours.. Regardless, I'm tired of everything being broken, including me. -Erin Forquer

Don't hate yourself for your mistakes. They are part of your story, and your story isn't finished yet. -Erin Forquer

Find the things, or people, that keep you afloat.. and hold onto them like a life raft when your life turns into a storm. -Erin Forquer

The world may be broken, and wildly unfair... But you can keep fighting to not let it break you, or tarnish the beauty that is yours, and yours alone. Erin Forquer

The easiest people to connect to, are the ones who don't pretend. Or hide. Or act like the world doesn't bother them. -Erin Forquer

Hope may be a fickle thing at times.. it can prolong our suffering and fool us into many things. And even though the truth may be that love isn't fair, or even kind sometimes, and perhaps fairness doesn't really exist, we all still need hope. We need to believe, to hold desperately onto the possibility that things can be better, because sometimes... they actually turn out that way. And that is worth the risk. -Erin Forquer

Find the places, and people, who celebrate you exactly as you are. And if you can't find them around you, then let me apologize for the world... we all too often don't recognize beauty when we desperately need it. -Erin Forquer

I only know my story, not yours. It's okay if you stay. But I will go where all of me is celebrated, wherever I am met in fields and celebrated. - Emily Maynard

One day you'll wake up... hard, face down on the concrete. Your body will ache, but it will be nothing compared to the pain that exists deep within your heart. And eventually, when the scabs form and the scars settle in, you'll realize the only thing gained from loving a certain person is the new knowledge you have of what you don't want. I hope you find whatever peace you can in that truth, because its all I have. -Erin Forquer

"Often, it's the most deserving people who cannot help loving those who destroy them."

It's important to feel other peoples' pain. But don't let it allow you to forget your own. Because when you forget the pain, you forget the love, too. -Erin Forquer

Let it be known that I was who I am. 

I used to write this for you... Then in spite of you.... And then because of you... Now, I write this for me. Because my journey didn't begin, or end, with you. And that is both liberating and overwhelming.

First you broke in and you stole my loneliness. But then you gave it back, and took everything good with you. But I'll track it down again.

Love me 'til I'm me again. 

Sometimes, you just have to give life a chance. And remember, no matter what it throws at you, that life is worth living. But sometimes you have to give it a chance to prove it to you.

Sometimes, the greatest gift we can learn, is unlearning all the damage, hate, and doubt that the world has taught us.

Forget what we're told, before we get too old. 

-Snow Patrol

Sometimes, we find our truths in ugly places. But sometimes, we find our saviors there, too.

Quote: Erin Forquer

And it was. It was worth it. I have the scars to prove it.

It took me a while to get it. Maybe too long. Maybe too soon. But at least I know what's true to me.

With the pain, comes understanding. -Erin Forquer

Anne Frank once said “Look at how a single candle can both defy and define the darkness.” I think that's pretty true of humanity, too.

“Look at how a single candle can both defy and define the darkness.”

-Anne Frank

Don't stop fighting. But most of all, don't stop believing there is something worth fighting for (it's your life).

Ever tried?

Ever failed?

No matter. 

Try again. 

Fail again. 

Fail better.

-Samuel Beckett

Don't let love conquer you. It's there for you to find- conquer all the defenses you've built against it.

Don't let the fear of losing something hold you back. And if you do lose it, then it was never really yours at all.

Don't let your happiness depend on something you may lose.

-C.S. Lewis